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Why Do "They" Keep Hurting Me?

Updated: Jan 25, 2021

What if I told you the responsibility of feeling hurt may be your responsibility? You may ask how am I responsible for what someone did? You may not be responsible for that part, but you are responsible for how far you let it enter your heart.


It seems the more that I blog and do my Monday night lives "E-motion Monday's" (please click on link to subscribe!) the more God digs in different aspects of my life that needs help. The word of God does cut like a two-edged sword right? Whatever I share that the Lord has given me, I have to go through it as well. Everything I share in my blogs and live tapings are a result of being processed and molded. With that being said, God highlighted a scripture that ministered to me when it comes to protecting your self from not necessarily becoming hurt, but protecting your heart from absorbing the impact. Not like a wall, not like a barrier that prevents anything from coming in once its up, but sort of a shield that can easily be taken down and held up.

The scripture that God showed me was in Philippians 4:6-7:

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

When hurt does come along in our lives we have to learn to give it to God. That is what the scripture says right? It didn't say pray about some things and hold on to the other things, It didn't say worry about this and let God take on that. It says EVERYTHING, including the people that hurt you. This is a familiar scripture that a lot of us may know but this time around it ministered to me in this season of grooming of my life. That is the miracle in the mystery of the Word of God. Each time that you go back it reveals something that seems tailor made for your situation. The 7th verse of this scripture stood out to me the most:

Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

There is so much in this! Let me put this in perspective, once you have prayed about who or what hurt you, God will give you peace beyond your understanding! You may be justified in your pain, you may be justified in feeling how you feel about the person, but because you gave that to God in prayer, He will give you the supernatural peace! The peace is supernatural because it does not make sense, given the variables of the situation that you are facing and what that person might have done to you! Whew!

So wait, I am not finished! Then the scripture goes on to say that the supernatural peace that you have gained from God will guard your heart and your mind as long as you stay connected to Him. We have to be careful that when someone does hurt us it does not take us away from our Father. We have to be careful that the pain does not plant seeds of bitterness against the other person. If we don't bring that thing into prayer, we are subjected to the attacks of the enemy on our hearts and minds. That is the plan of the enemy. The enemy does not want you to bring anything to God in prayer, to break it down further, the enemy does not want you to gain the comfort that prayer brings, the peace that it brings! When you achieve that peace you can love on another level!

So why do I say that it may be our fault that we let others hurt us? Really what I am trying to say it is our responsibility to guard our hearts. The reasons that we allow hurt to transform us into someone that God has not made us is because we leave our hearts unguarded. Doesn't King Solomon, one of the wisest men in the Bible tell us to:

“Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life”?

(Proverbs 4:23).

I have stated many times on my live tapings how much of a fan I am of Jonathan McReynolds the gospel music singer and how much of his teachings and music impact my life. There is one thing that he said recently that ministered to me. He said,

You are suppose to be seen, but you can't allow those that came to see you to touch you. There are those that are only assigned to see you and not touch you.

My interpretation is this, as God is using you, you are suppose to be the light for everyone to see for the purposes of you bringing them to Jesus. This involves being transparent, like looking through a glass window. We all know that comes with persecution, trials, rude comments, and guess what.....people doing hurtful things! As you are transparent, you still are protected.

I have learned what it truly means to guard my heart. At first it was a bit confusing when hearing it so much and so eloquently said by many preachers, but the best thing to learn is how. How do I guard my heart? And that my blog readers is through prayer. Prayer brings you peace and it will help guard your heart knowing that God will handle all matters that enter your space. You don't have to be the one to straighten someone out, you don't have to be the one to let them know, or to teach them a lesson. Hand it over to God and get ready to receive that precious gift of peace so that your heart will continue to love and so you wont forfeit your future and turn into what tried to hurt you.

God Bless.

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